Wednesday, May 17, 2006

How Does It Feel To Die Alone In the Dark?


How does it feel to die alone in the dark?

Chained. Beaten. Starved then force-fed.

Thinking of your children, how old are they now?

Not even a picture of them to ease your passing,

How does it feel to die alone in the dark?

How does it feel to be surrounded in your last days and muffled hours

by people who hate you because they're told to and for no reason other.

Do you hallucinate? Your mother's kind face as she cleanses your wounds,

your father's strong hands hold you as he tells you it's going to be ok. You try to be strong

and not weep in front of your father. He smiles as his tears mingle with yours.

My sweet wife, I did nothing wrong. I hope someday you can mourn at my grave.

Will my family know when I have gone?

How does it feel to die alone in the dark?

Will there ever be justice for me? Or will I simply disappear?

Will my memory fade away as my life fades from me now?

Taken, my precious life, the one gift that can never be given back to me.

Taken by the good and the righteous, to defend something I never threatened.

And as I feel the life falling from me, I see my children, their hands outstretched.....

I smile through the tears, oh my babies, I've missed you so....

I see my family there, and beyond as light fills the room ......

How does it feel to die alone in the dark?


  • At 12:44 AM, Blogger Again said…

    i have to repeat myself - great writing skills, Robert

    and yes, that's the reason, why i say, that truly intelligent people can't be cruel - simply because intelligence needs imagination (simulation of different scenarios) and is able to understand how dangerous life can be, so that sooner or later even the strongest needs help (and the Nazis - or the Neocons - don't proof me wrong, isn't it? Remember well the disappointed interviewers of the Nazis, wondering how stupid that guys were. Even the "intelligent" killer doesn't proof me wrong - because those people seem to suffer from a sort of megalomania)

    if you try to imagine how pain feels, i can't believe that common people can do it unto others...

  • At 12:02 PM, Anonymous ML said…

    Not only was SF's Willie Brown warned not to fly on 9-11 by Condoleezza Rice, but the NY Times editor and Judy Miller were tipped off months in advance. All the criminal elite knew. All the CIA assets and media plants knew.

  • At 12:55 PM, Anonymous JMF said…

    Robert, there's only one word to describe this one: "Bravo!" As in your prior "Razor", you 've struck a very deep, primal chord here.

  • At 1:28 PM, Anonymous JMF said…

    A commendably impassioned response to a more sedate (but equally devastating) report I posted here a while ago. Schmookler pulls no punches in damning the incredibly culpable Bush Reich: "The Worst President in History?" Why the Question Mark?, by Andrew Bard Schmookler ==== ... In subverting our democracy, this Bushite regime is attacking the heart of America -- what generations of Americans going off to war have been told we must fight to protect. This is what takes this presidency beyond other failed or corrupt or criminal administrations. ==== Not only does this administration embody the sins of all the past administrations --- corruption, abuse of power, leading us along the path of destruction -- but the crisis of this moment in American history is unique in this crucial respect: the problem is not that this administration is mismanaging a national crisis, it is that they themselves are the crisis. ...

  • At 3:11 PM, Anonymous JMF said…

    ML: Here's the *original* Miller inteview: The 9/11 Story That Got Away [AlterNet]. Frankly, I don't know exactly *what* to make of it. For one thing, the headline is entirely misleading. The actual content of the piece doesn't in any way support a contention that "General Judy" was specifically forewarned about 9/11 (per se); it merely relays her assertion that she was tipped off to "something big in the works" during the *summer* of 2001, which she and others actually assumed would occur around 4th of July. (The warning given to San Francisco Mayor Willie Brown, on the other hand, was *contemporaneous* with the actual attacks and highly specific regarding the timeframe and M.O. -- he was directly advised not to *fly* on *9/11*, as were several others.) ==== At this point, I'd take *anything* Judith Miller puts out with a HUGE grain of salt, based on her past history, and assume it may merely be disinformation. She's now a thoroughly *discredited* journalist -- rightly so, in my mind -- who's also a deep government insider, intricately linked to the NeoConNazi cabal via close personal friendships (e.g., with Rumsfeld) and through common, right-wing organizational affiliations [AEI?]. Plus, this particular piece suggests a "hidden agenda" to me, in that it most dramatically "muddies the waters" by reinforcing the dubious notion that Bush simply "wasn't taking seriously" those Summer 2001 warnings. As we now know, his August 6 PDB leaves NO "wiggle room" for any such excuse of a "misguided but benign" lack of situational awareness -- the reality is, at *best*, one of criminal negligence (much like in Katrina), and I really don't subscribe to "best case scenarios" where the Bush Regime is involved. ==== In terms of "stunning revelations" about 9/11 itself, this one's really "a dog that won't hunt". On the other hand, I do find it terribly intriguing that Miller's co-authored book, "Germs" -- which reads very much like a "call to arms", particularly against Saddam Hussein -- was specifically pegged for release on September 10, just in time for the Reich's initial proposal to attack *Iraq* as supposed "retaliation" and scant weeks before those amazingly curious, *still-unsolved* (i.e., officially forgotten) "Anthrax attacks", which so forcefully helped propel USA PATRIOT into law. One can't help but notice the remarkable timing "coincidence" there!

  • At 3:28 PM, Anonymous ML said…

    Miller is as obvious a CIA asset as you can get. Tipping her and other CIA media assets off to something big shortly before 9-11 is merely part of the planned psychological operation to prep compliant media to blame the al Qaeda bogeyman and not the Dick Cheney 9-11 MIHOP.

  • At 4:36 PM, Anonymous JMF said…

    [FYI -- A Public Service Announcement]: I'm reproducing here part of an email I received from Working Assets/Act for Change, in order to provide a "shameless plug" for what I perceive as a highly attractive alternative -- one which will deliberately *safeguard* your privacy, among other nice things -- to the rank complicity of the Fascist phone Corporatistas. I just switched my own (Verizon) long-distance service to these folks, and I'm relieved, to say the least. ==== Yes, I've read that Verizon and Bell South have both issued "denials" (after a fashion) of involvement in the NSA data mining scheme. Sorry, but I'm just disinclined to believe them at this point. And this is a very worthy plan, in my mind, wherein a portion of the long-distance charges is donated to support Progressive causes: A Message From Working Assets' President ==== In light of new revelations about the big telecommunications carriers' handing over domestic calling records to the National Security Agency, I am writing to let you know where Working Assets stands on the NSA's increasingly alarming activities. ==== Working Assets believes that the warrantless monitoring of phone conversations ordered by the Bush administration is illegal and unacceptable. As reported yesterday in USA Today (linked below), AT&T, Bell South and Verizon sold customer call records to the NSA. We also unequivocally oppose the disclosure of domestic calling records to the NSA by our nation's telecommunications providers. Working Assets would never, under any circumstances, give (let alone sell) records to the Bush administration without a warrant or court order. ==== In fact, as Working Assets' President, I recently signed on to an amicus brief supporting the ACLU's law suit against the National Security Agency. We are the only telephone company participating in this lawsuit. ... ==== Working Assets has never been approached by any government agency seeking our help in illegally accessing the content of conversations by our customers, and we would refuse any such request. We are actively engaged in opposing warrantless monitoring, in pushing for full disclosure by the government regarding the scope of the monitoring, and in protecting citizens from intrusive and illegal exercises of governmental power. ... ==== If you are a member of AT&T (including Cingular and SBC), Bell South or Verizon, your telecom company willingly sold the private telephone records of American citizens to the Bush administration's illegal domestic spying operation. ... ==== You can also find out more about Working Assets Wireless and Working Assets Long Distance at ...

  • At 4:47 PM, Anonymous JMF said…

    "Miller is as obvious a CIA asset as you can get. ..." ML: Can't argue with you there. And the rest of your comments in that post seem entirely reasonable to me. (It was just that it didn't *sound* like that was what you were getting at originally that prompted me to reply as I did.)

  • At 5:12 PM, Blogger Robert said…

    I tried to sign up for Qwest way back when but they don't cover my area, so I'm stuck with the fascist enablers at Bellsouth. For now. I don't say anything I wouldn't want the cowardly fucks in the NSA to hear anyway. I've got other ways to communicte my plans for the overthrow of...

    I mean my plans to sing the national anthem (in english) while blugeoning and illegal immigrant with a Bible :)

    As far as the Miller story, any other day that should be front page, lead story stuff. But the shit is hitting the fan on so many different fronts a scorecard is required. I'm just fascinated by the reaction on the rabid right to all of these revelations. I mean their grasp of reality has always been suspect but even some bloggers I respected for their thorough reporting and passion for their intellectually and morally bankrupt points of view, have gone out into la la land in their defense of what is so obviously an anti-freedom, and anti-constitutional spying program.

    Couple this with calls to "round up" 11 million illegals....

    Of course the implosion and rift between the rabid right and the batshit insane religious right is coming over the amendment protecting marriage from the hoards of sodomites just waiting to join themselves in un-holy matrimony, so that should take some steam from this runaway train. Because that Super-Majority that Perkins, Falwell, and Robertson get a spirit-filled hardon just thinking about, just aint gonna happen.

  • At 9:51 PM, Anonymous b said…

    robert, I guess I was the only one to read between the lines and frankly, I'm worried about you.

    and yes, that's the reason, why i say, that truly intelligent people can't be cruel - simply because intelligence needs imagination (simulation of different scenarios) and is able to understand how dangerous life can be...

    I have to disagree with you. For once I think you're very wrong. Some of the most intelligent people I know are also some of the cruelest and yes, they have great imaginations which makes their cruelty even more deadly.

    if you try to imagine how pain feels, i can't believe that common people can do it unto others...

    What????? I've been rendered speechless at this point.

    As to the rest, I don't give a flying fuck what happens in the US, who was warned, who's listening, any of it. I feel sorry for those of you who have no choice but to live there. I'm staying as far away from politics as I can because they're bullshit and nothing read can be believed, regardless of the source. That's my mindset these days. I may piss some of you off, but tough titty, ya know? I've had it.

    With that, I take my leave and not of my senses which are just fine, thank you.

  • At 1:05 AM, Blogger Again said…


    thanks for answering - know that i'm here far away from mainstream ;-)

    What????? I've been rendered speechless at this point.

    wow - seems to me that you are even more cynical than me, but maybe that's just because i know from other cultures where people really were more peaceful and more human...

    I have to disagree with you. For once I think you're very wrong. Some of the most intelligent people I know are also some of the cruelest and yes, they have great imaginations which makes their cruelty even more deadly.

    yes, i know, most people think so - but when you look at those cruel people, they are something like autistic - specialists in some "intelligent" skills, but incapable of communication (not to be confused with manipulation) - do you really believe they are able to imagine how THEY would feel if they would be treated like they wish to treat others? No, they are not - they simply believe, that they are too strong, too rich, too clever FOREVER to need help - and that this works for so many rich, pampered SOBs, proves just one thing: our culture is itself not intelligent, not interested in the future, because too stupid to realize, that future might change: based on the wrong foundation - and therefore it must and will kill itself including all that "rich, strong, powerful, super-clever" people - and the time seems to come soon, that our un-intelligent behavior will have to be paid

    because intelligence is the conquest of the future - not some isolated skills, useful in some crazy cultures at some crazy times - intelligent are the generalists, not the specialists, that's just the typical problem of our definition of intelligence, dependent on the inability of our "elite" to understand information - so the carreerists of science and industry often CALL behavior "intelligent", which in fact isn't able to protect future. But behavior attacking future is not intelligent (s. Bertrands Paradox) - never. The IQ=135-scientist, telling you that you may drive your SUV as long as you want because cars aren't "proved" to cause global warming - is intelligent? No, he may be smart, he may be clever - but not intelligent, because relating to the future he acts like an animal - "it will go forever as it went without change - if the poor die from floods or deserts, we just stop paying insurance for them and let them die (remember Katrina?). That doesn't cost me money, they are gone and my career is pushed"

    he simply is too stupid to understand the complexity of Gaia-cycles and that a chaotic system is able to buffer many changes - until it starts to cough - then the alarm bells should ring, because then it needs only a tiny tip to destroy the whole system

    none of your "intelligent" cruel people understand that, simply too stupid

    there is this cave painting in France, where the lions on top of the picture look at horses, walking into the left side beneath something like a rainbow, above small fighting rhinocerosses - there you see, what the people thought about violence BEFORE they were Pavlov-trained by their alphas to think and act like chimps again - lions represent medicine, horses represent human souls, the left represents the West, the sinking sun, death - and the rhinocerosses represent brute, blind force - small, mean, at the bottom of humankind, killing good souls so that even medicine can't help

    WHY it is possible to educate human children to behave like apes, to educate mothers to maltreat her own baby-girl with pieces of broken glass without anesthesia?

    because intelligence is able to learn each and everything - even the most stupid nonsense, if only it looks like information. And crazy cultures can - for a while - buffer reality to create crazy repeatable, identifiable processes (information). That's how it works: even cultures can lie, look at the "intelligent design" stuff or the myths about reproduction

    but inevitably the buffer will be overextended at some time - and then the culture has to crash, will kill many people at that time and will be replaced by other cultures. Alas, because we fell prey to the Alphas since thousands of years, every human culture with intelligent foundation (like democracy) seems to be doomed to be beaten by chimps. And it works like Mr. Bush shows: America was built on the power and strength of democracy, but now it is rich and mighty and able to buffer the Alphas against reality for a long, long time and against many, many people - so the Alphas take over America, suck her strength and wealth until she's too weak to defend herself, then the other cultures will come and take her over: China is waiting

    no, that's not intelligence, that's "to saw the branch off on which you sit"

  • At 3:15 AM, Blogger Again said…

    With that, I take my leave and not of my senses which are just fine, thank you.

    so sorry to hear that - i needed Roberts reply to understand that

    and so sorry to see that it seems to be my fault

  • At 4:02 AM, Anonymous b said…

    It's not your fault, again. Please read my comment under the B thread.


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